Monday, May 24, 2010

If I Had a Twitter Feed...

...this is why no one wants me to twitter. Here would have been today's tweets:

9:00 a.m.--"Just heading out into what might be a beautiful day. Going to see the ladies at playgroup. Yay."

10:30 a.m.--"Oh, hell. Kiddo falling apart because of a fake vacuum with a real vacuum noise."

10:45 a.m.--"Kiddo bites it coming out of sandbox. Dark ominous clouds. Damn."

11-something--"At New Deal for lunch; left playgroup before actual melting occurred."

11-something 15 minutes later--"Who the heck takes 20 minutes to make a pbj? Get real."

1 p.m.-- "Standing on an overpass, watching trucks. Kiddo just playing with a piece of dirty old gum. Should wash his hands in spit and prayers."

1:05 p.m.--"Never mind. Just grabbed dried bird poo."

2:35 p.m.--"Home in the garden. Just got the lettuce in. Kiddo watering plants and self." (this will become a theme later)

3:00 p.m.--"A cup of tea at three never tasted so good."

4:00 p.m.--"Watching it start to go downhill.

5:30 p.m.--"Mad dash to clean clean clean for preschool tomorrow."

6:00 p.m.--"Kiddo spills water all over floor. Mama unhappy."

6:15 p.m.--"Joe home. Downstairs, escaping on computer."

And now dinner's done, and you know why I think those Status reports are nonsense. Let me know if you ever want a play-by-play. Off to eat and torment child with the vacuum once more!

1 comment:

Amanda Perko said...

hil.ario.us.

xoxo,
Amanda